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7.31.2007

Things You Should Know About Me...

1. Math is not my strong point. Hence me thinking my period was late when it really wasn't time for it to come. Like I was a whole week or more off.

2. My boob ache is more than likely from the coming-not-late period and no breastfeeding in the past 30 days than anything else.

3. I spazz over everything when I'm PMSing, when I'm not PMSing... basically around the clock spazz.

4. Am tired. Carrying my ass to bed.

7.30.2007

Sux2BU...

Why, might you ask?

Well, why wouldn't you want to be me?

After all, I'm the chick that missed work today because she couldn't find her fucking ID badge. The same badge used to log onto her computer, you know, so I can do my fucking job. The same badge that is used to open doors after hours. Same badge needed to take my kid to daycare. Same stupid fucking badge that I'd have to file a police report for if I lost it.

And I lost it.

Fuck me.

I can't find it anywhere. I brought it home Friday. I put it in the same location I ALWAYS put it, and it's gone. No one's been here but me on Friday, didn't get the kids until Saturday morning and didn't return with them to the house until that evening. Where in the hell is it?

Pissed doesn't describe how I feel right now.

Reason #2 you'd wish you were me: my period is late.

Don't fuck me.

Get your mind out of the gutter. It's not late because of that. (Yes, I peed on a stick to make sure the impossible hadn't happened.)

Reason #3 you wish you were me: my left breast aches off and on and it has been happening for quite some time. Could be hormones, could be one too many underwire bras, could've been a pulled muscle... who knows? I feel no lumps, no difference between the left or right breasts... still scary. Scary enough to make a doctor's appointment.

Reason #4 you wish you were me: I've been having nightmares daily (or should it be nightly?). Already don't get enough sleep, now enter another irritant to further rob me of it.

Fuck.
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An aside... my primary complaint, can be remedied. I can get another badge. Shitload of things to go through to get it but it can be done. Looking at the other things I listed, and things I haven't mentioned... it just amazes me how some people behave sometimes. Men... are so FAR from my thoughts right now; yet people, men in particular, seem to think they hold the foremost place in my thoughts.

Really, y'all ain't shit. Ain't been shit. Ain't shit to me. All I am to you (men) is a filler until you get what you want, whether it's pussy, companionship, or whatever. Fine. Whatever. Doesn't bother me much. But PLEASE don't think that you and only you are what matters to me. Because I know damned well how little I matter to you. N*gga please. Yes, some of you I know I hold a special spot in your heart; and it's returned believe me. But right now, sex, cuddling, talking about what your wife/girlfriend has/hasn't done to you/for you... really not caring bout it at all. It amuses me to note how offended men get when they can't have their way. So quick to assume I'm being a bitch.

No one ever bothers to ask what might be wrong.

7.27.2007

2 Days and 3 Nights...

Jesus God I am tired.

No, I'm not tired for the usual reasons. I sent the kiddies packing earlier in the week so I could attempt to get this house straight. Gonna take a LOT more than 2 days to get this place together but I got a lot done and I'm feeling good about it.

I dropped the girls off at my parents house Wednesday evening. The plan was to go home and clean and pull something close to an all nighter; Get up early Thursday morning and get in to work by 6 so I could get off at 2:30 and come home, clean and pull another late nighter and repeat on Friday. Pick the kids up on Saturday.

What happened was this:

-got home Wednesday night. I ate dinner while it was still piping hot and did not have to share it, get up and refill plates or glasses, nor did I have to coax a certain someone to "eat for mommy" or tell anyone to "stop hurling food this minute".

-looked at all that needed to be done, cuddled the cat for about 5 minutes and promptly hauled my tired ass to bed. I slept all night, HARD, in one position and woke with a hellified crick in my neck.

- Thursday after work was really when I dove into the muck. Tired my ass out completely, but not so much that I couldn't go out for Chinese food which, once again, I didn't have to share... well, I shared with the cat but she doesn't eat much so it didn't count. Another lovely, childless evening marred only by the fact that I had to toss out every single speck of food in my refridgerator and freezer because of the amount of time the power was off. I opened the door to the fridge and was hit with rancid food smell. Nothing salvaged but some freeze pops and ketchup. Bummer.

-by Friday I am worn the fuck out. Who knew I had so much shit? I started with nothing and now... even after purging tons of stuff I still feel like I have too much. And I do. The kids have way too many toys and stuffed animals (I swear they are humping the night away because they seem to multiply like jackrabbits). I have clothes and crap everywhere. But I'm working through it. I can see floors again and I hauled bag after bag of trash, toys, and clothes to the dumpster.

And before anyone emails me scolding that I should've donated the clothes, I normally do donate. But not clothing soaked in cat pee. That's just gross.

I also discovered why the cat has been on a pissing spree as of late but I'm too tired to go into it right now.

I'm going to bed.

7.25.2007

The Sun'll Come Out?

Still power-less.

No sunshine outside. Just rain.

*sigh*

7.24.2007

When Life Hands You Lemons...

When life hands you lemons, make lemonade...
-anonymous

Then pour it into your finest crystal and throw that shit straight up against the wall.
-me

Forget optimism. I tried to remain optimistic all fucking day and hell I feel like being a pessimist. So if you are tired of my whining, tired of my complaints, this is clearly not the entry for you. Come back tomorrow when the sun is sun-sunny and I will clearly tell you how excited I am about life and how I'm changing this and that and...

Bah.

Look, it's been a hellified day and I'm moody and depressed with a yeast infection and I'm in the dark.

The dark people. Anyone care to guess why?

Because my dumbass forgot to pay the bill. I misread the due date. By the time I found out the power was off customer service was closed and thus it's been a very stressful, sweaty evening. Avoidable? Entirely, simply pay the bill on time. I know. Annoying as fuck when you realize the bill's due date was the 23rd for the past due amount and the 31st for the current amount. More annoying is the fact that you realize as you dial customer service at approximately 7:03 that they turn their phones off at exactly 7.

Fuck. Thank you Dominion Power.

So id I make spelling errors, it;s because I am typing in the dark and cannot see the keys and I am SICK to death of squinting to find the backspace key on this laptop keyboard.

Fuck.

On the positive side, it's a relatively cool evening/night so the kids are sleeping in their diapers and panties, respectively after being allowed to play outside way after the street lights came on. I brought them in, gave them benadryl to help them sleep, I mean to help with their allergies, wiped them down with a cool wet washcloth and sprinkled their limp tired bodies with baby powder to help cool them down.

On the negative side my cell is about to die, as is my laptop battery, I am wide awake despite the fact that I could barely keep my eyes open all day. Adding to the negative side, last night the cat peed on my backpack, the baby's diaper bag, my newspaper and my brand new purse I just bought Friday.

Jesus God I wish that bitch would die.

I love animals. I love PETA. I love cats, just not mine. She can be the sweetest thing, but if things don;t go her way there will be hell to pay. Hence when I changed the brand of litter to something better (Tidy Cats with crystal shit in it) and she opposed I get cat piss all over the fucking house.

And I take it back. I do not love all animals. Am currently hating mosquitoes since they think I am tasty. Thanks you flying leeches, now I get to itch in more spots than just below the equator.

The sun'll come out tomorrow,
Bet your bottom dollar that tomorrow...
There'll be sun...

Bah.

7.23.2007

Jesus Take the Wheel

Boy am I a moody bitch these past several days.

I know most ladies are a wee sensitive when PMSing and let me tell you when it happens to me every month, I am no trip to the beach. Some things genuinely tick me off, PMS or not... Like I have this thing about respect. I feel that if I respect you, you respect me. Not hard right? So hypothetically if I say No to something or Yes to something you respect my answer one way or the other. Or is that just me? Like if you asked me hey do you want to go jump off a cliff with me and my response was No, I'll catch you later on that one... don't try and convince me to do it. I said no, so leave it at that. It irritates the shit out of me for people to try and change my mind instead of respecting the answer that I initially gave.

Uh, not that this happened recently or anything. Heh.

Told you I was a moody bitch.

Anyway, I've been off all day today because the baby was sick (but not really since she miraculously healed herself of fever and pain by the time the doctor arrived) and in between bouts of worry, bitchiness and dementia from lack of sleep I noticed my mood taking a serious nosedive (that's never a good thing prior to 10 a.m.) so as I drove along I decided to do a wee bit of mental stimulation.

I was looking at all the personalized license plates and remembering how when I was a kid there was never any type of variations available. You simply got a state issued plate with the first three characters being alpha, a hyphen, followed by three numeric characters. Now it seems everyone has a personalized plate of some sort (including yours truly).

So, back to my mental stimulation. I got to thinking about the types of plates certain people could have or should have.

Like a dentist that is a member of the Y where Jaalyn attends has the plate: JAW DR

So could an orthodontist get MBRC THS?

Or a plumber? PIPE DWN

A Roofer? OVRHEAD

A Comcast employee? FCKUOVR

How bout those man whores? NSEMN8U

I had to stop at that one. I was having WAY too much fun.

7.21.2007

Hiatus

I know, I haven't posted in almost a month.

I suck.

I'll be back shortly though. With plenty of lengthy explainations and musings and photographic evidence that my children are in fact still driving me insane.

I've no excuse not to post anymore. I'm all technologically inclined now. I've got WiFi. I can post from anywhere now cause:

Duuuuude! I got a Dell!