And now...

How many times has my finger hovered above the "Delete Blog" button?

I'm not sure why I even keep this blog going. It's taken an entirely different direction than I intended. I wanted it to be one thing but it's morphed into a far more personal journal; more personal than I ever expected.

I suppose the biggest "fear" I have, which I know I share with many other bloggers, is that fear of being judged. Yes, I write what I am feeling, but it's not a true embodiement of who I am as a person or an accurate summation of my character. On the other hand, I don't really care how I am judged for the exact same reasons stated. Because I know that this blog is not a full representation of me.

When I write, I write how I feel. Whether it's happiness, or anger, frustration, depression... it's all very spur-of-the-moment. Just as a diary would be. Only this diary is open to the world and some very mean people.

So, I don't know. This may be my last entry. I may decide to print the things I wrote about the kids, tuck it away in their baby books and delete this blog altogether. May decide to start up another. I'm not sure.