Kids say the darnedest things...

Mo-ooom! Come here! I got a mergency!

Me: A what??

I hit my big toe, take me to the hospital it’s a mergency!

*******

I know where fish heaven is mommy. It’s right here (points to stomach). Because when they die we eat them so heaven must be here in my tummy. It must be where pig heaven, cow heaven and chicken heaven are too.

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Our neighbor three apts down has 5 (five!) albino pythons. He had one draped around his neck and we (the kids and I) stared and spoke to him from a distance. He went into his apartment briefly and emerged with another, larger snake which he placed on the ground so it could exercise and explore a bit. I asked could I let the girls come over to see it and he acquiesced. Jaalyn stopped about 5 feet from the snake and announced “You know what? I can see it just fine from here.” The snake had other ideas though since she continued to make a beeline for my feet. Trinity stared and stared at the snake while I repeated “See the snake? See? See SNAKE?!” as if she could possibly miss the giant 14 foot yellow snake slithering towards us.

Trinity stared at it, pointed and yelled “SEE MOMMY?! SEE KITTY! KITTY-KITTY!”

“Uh, no baby, it’s a snake. S-N-A-K-E.”

*looks at snake*

*looks at me incredulously*

*sighs and shakes head*

“Kitty, mama…”

***********

I swear if I didn't have my girls to keep me going I'd go totally bonkers. Come to think of it, sometimes I think I'm totally bonkers because of my kids so I guess that means that I'm cancelling out something somewhere. But they are always a source of happiness and laughter for me. Whether it's Jaalyn's thoughtful theories of fish heaven or a discussion about how everyone, even the divine Beyonce poops and has to wipe their butt, or watching Trinity dance to anything remotely musical. I swear that girl is so much like me. She can find the melody in any noise, whether it's water rushing out of the drainspout, cicadas singing in the trees or the jingles of the neighborhood ice cream truck. That diapered booty gets to shaking, knees bend and lately she's added a head bop that would put the best acid rock head banger to shame. Sends me into peals of laughter and delight every time I see it. One day I will have to post a video of her dancing to Beyonce's "Get Me Bodied" video. When the "pat yo weave ladies" part comes on... believe me, if you're not laughing at her you'll be flinching from the enthusiastic way she, uh, pats.

I seem to be losing more friends nowadays. Some I'm voluntarily letting go and others are blowing up in my face. I think I lost one Friday over something un-fucking-believable. (I wrote about it here.) But I suppose if the friendship is lost over something so damned stupid, perhaps it wasn't true to begin with. Very difficult to have a platonic friendship after you've sampled the merchandise. Perhaps that friendship should've been put to rest a while ago. After Friday I think you could stick a fork in it though; it's done.

Another friendship thats unraveling at the seam involves my BFF (I totally feel like an ass using such a trendy phrase.) but I think I will have to discuss that at another time. Kiddos are antsy and they come first before blogging.